Tell Me Again About the Night I Was Born

I've been thinking a lot lately about giving birth. Probably because of my friend Kim and everything she has been through with her baby William. (I don't know how to post a link to previous blogs-or else I'd do it here...can anyone help?!) Anyway, William passed early Friday morning, and was delivered Saturday, 8/15 at 12:40. Kim and her husband were able to spend some time with him & a non-profit organization, Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep, came and took pictures for the family. She is home now recooperating, and really needs our prayers as she goes through this extremely difficult greiving process.

I've also been thinking about birth a lot today, as one of Kyle's cousins (by marriage) is about to become a Daddy, and we are also waiting to hear back from 2 friends Doctor's appointments who are close to delivering.

Since Zachary's birth last year, I've meant to take the time to write down everything I remember about the experience, because I knew I'd forget all those little details...like the pain of labor-oh wait-I didn't have any! (YAY C-Sections!) Anyway, like I said, I've been meaning to. Well, hopefully 375 days later I can still remember enough to one day read this and recall that day God brought the most precious baby into this world...

Let's actually start 374 days ago, August 7, 2008. We had met with our doctor, Dr. Shull, that Monday and had decided that it was time for Zachary to make his debut, no later than Friday. Dr. Shull thought that he might be 8 pounds or more (and it really was a good chance, considering Kyle and I were both nearly 9 pound babies!). Plus there was concern that my pelvis was small and he might not be able to be safely delivered vaginally. So he gave us 2 options: 1) Be admitted Thursday night to the hospital, and run Cervadil through me all night to try and induce labor and attempt a vaginal birth (Did I mention that I had not begun to dialate AT ALL?!) or 2) Plan a sceduled C-section for Friday. We chose 1, but with the understanding that a C-section was still very possible.

That Thursday afternoon Kyle and I had our last "Just the 2 of us" day together. We went to see The Dark Knight, courtesy of free movie tickets from my MIL. And then we went to eat at Macaroni Grill, which I had not been able to eat (keep down) the whole pregnancy, courtesy of my Mom. Then we came back home, re-checked our packed bags, made a quick stop at Wal-Mart for some Ben & Jerry's and a People magazine, and headed to the hospital. And let me tell you, I am GLAD we did because I didn't get to eat again until Saturday morning-UGH. I hate to say this, but I don't really remember much about when we got to the hospital. I guess I was so preoccupied with what was about to happen that everything else left my brain! I do remember being FREAKED out about getting my IV in, especially after the last IV I had. Early in my pregnancy I was not keeping anything down, and eventually had to go to the hospital for IV fluids. It took them over an HOUR to get the IV in, partially because I was so dehydrated and partially because I have uncooperative veins. Anyway, they got me on the first stick-hooray!-and THANK YOU! Then Kyle went out to the car to unload all our junk before they put the Cervadil in and we got settled for the night. So, while Kyle's out and I'm all alone in the hospital room, hooked up to all the machines, I completely realize that WE"RE ABOUT TO HAVE A BABY and feel the need to use the bathroom, if you know what I mean...So I get out of the bed, drag my IV with me, and head to the bathroom. When Kyle returns, he finds me still there, because I am unable to wipe with that stinking IV in...Bless his heart. I'm sure I'll have to return the favor one of these days in our old age (but hopefully not!)

I don't remember much else about that night except 2 things: 1) The Cervadil being put in (can we say uncomfortable?) and 2) Calling my Mom to tell her I was scared, and realizing they were in the car already on their way, justincase the Cervadil did its thing. I was so happy they would be there for the whole thing!

**In case anyone is actually still reading this, you might want to go take a restroom break, grab a snack, or do something to wake you up. Like I said, I wanna write down everything I remember, and y'all know I can tend to get wordy!**

Okay, back to the story now. I woke up on August 8 after a very restless nights sleep hopeful that the Cervadil was doing something, but also realistically planning to have someone CUT MY TUMMY OPEN. Hell-o. The doctor was to come by about 8:00 a.m. and check if I had dialted any. Well maybe closer to 9:00 it was decided, nope, this baby is in no hurry to get out of me! So, C-section it was. We planned it for noon. What to do for 3 hours while you wait to have a human being pulled out of you?! Worry and go CRAZY, that's what! Because I certainly couldn't EAT, ya know! Again, I really don't remember what I did all that time, but let me tell ya, I had more than a 3 hour wait. Because 8-8-08 was obviously the coolest day to have your baby last year, my delivery kept getting pushed back. And just as I was getting ready to get prepped for delivery at 2:00, someone needed an emergency C-section. So I was pushed back-again. Finally I decided I would take a nap to pass the time, and believe it or not, I was actually able to! And when I was snoozing away they decided to come and tell me then that it was time to have this baby!

Don't know exactly what time the prep actually begun, although I do have some pictures of the clocks, thanks to my husband.

I do remember they gave me this anti-neausea drink that was EXTREMELY nasty and then they took me back to the operating room where they proceeded to give me my spinal, as Fergie's "Big Girls Don't Cry" played in the background. How ironic. Meanwhile Kyle and his Dad (who was joining us in the operating room in case Kyle passed out-seriously!) were playing around with their own operating room apparel.

As my body was quickly becoming a massive piece of jello-like substance, my birthing buddies came in and the doctors got to doing their thang. Don't know much what happened for the next several minutes, except that it kept feeling like I was being tickled and I was FREEZING. One time I said, "Ooh, that feels funny!" And Kyle was like, "Yeah, that should!" because he could see everything that was happening behind the curtain. I kept checking to make sure he wasn't going to pass out (like he nearly did at our first ultrasound). Finally the doctors said it would feel like they were "tugging" on me, and I did feel that! But, no baby! So, they re-worked some things and tried again. Tugging began one more time and "I can see the head!" And there it was, the first cry of my precious baby. The happy tears just began instantly flowing from me and Kyle, while Grandpa went to take pictures of Zachary as he got weighed, poked, and prodded. Unfortunately, I was not able to hold Zachary back in the operating room, but we did get to spend a good bit of time just staring at him. I was the last C-section planned of the day, so they took their time putting my tummy back together. One of the assissting doctors was so short, and we kept offering to get him a stool so he could reach me better!

During this time, Kyle, my FIL, and me just kept staring at Zachary in awe and crying, we couldn't believe he was finally in our arms. And he was BEAUTIFUL. I know this is nonsense, and so stupid and vain, but before he was born I was so scared I would have an ugly baby. I mean, I know all babies are precious, but some are just not pretty! I know that is awful to say...any other Moms have this fear before yours was born?!

It was also very emotional because Zachary was born on his late Great-Grandpa Moses' birthday. So we had 3 generations of Moses men in the room on the 4ths birthday-pretty special. Some people might think it is totally weird that my FIL was back there and not my mom, or at least my MIL. But my FIL is a certified peramedic and would be able to help Kyle if he passed out OR me if I freaked out back there because he has helped to deliver babies in emergency situations before. And it really didn't bother me. I joke with him now that he has seen more of me than I've seen of me!

After what seemed like FOREVER, but a wonderful forever, they took me to the recovery room where I proceeded to freeze to death, but here I was finally able to hold my baby boy. And so was everyone else. Who had been waiting forever while we took our sweet time in the operating room. Family got to come in by 2's and see him, while I was going, "Hey! I just gave birth here-I wanna hold him!" Not long after they took him to the nursery to be bathed and the like, while I recovered a bit and was moved to my room for the next few days. I remember when they moved me from the operating bed to the hospital bed I about freaked out when I saw how much blood was coming out of me! Thankfully I was still drugged up and couldn't feel a thing! That came the next day! UGH. While I was waiting for Zachary in my room, I BEGGED mercessly for food, but was denied everything but ice chips. Congratulations-you had a baby! Now, here's you some delicious ice chips! Ha!

Finally late that evening (maybe 9 or 10?) they brought Zachary back to the room to be with his Mommy and Daddy and the nurse stayed to help me nurse him for the first time. I still really don't know why I had to wait SO long to nurse him, but when I did finally get to, it really did feel so wonderful and natural that first time. And I felt like a Mommy. And it was wonderful.